Weddings

I. What is Christian marriage?

It is a solemn and public covenant between two people in the presence of God.  Liturgically, it is expressed as a sacramental rite in which those persons enter into a lifelong union, make their vows before God and the Church, and receive the grace and blessing of God to help them fulfill their vows.

The ministers of the marriage are the two persons, each administering the sacrament of marriage to the other. In their self-giving to the other, they recall Christ Jesus, who loved the Church and gave himself up for her.  The priest who presides at a marriage witnesses and blesses the union in the presence of the people gathered.  If it is appropriate, the priest also celebrates the Holy Eucharist for the newly married couple.

II. Who may be married in the Church?

It is required in the Episcopal Church that at least one of the parties be baptized with water in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit and that the marriage conform to the laws of the State of Missouri and canons of the Episcopal Church and the Diocese of West Missouri.

Since the marriage rite itself assumes participation and belief in the Church, it is required that the couple to be married sign a declaration of intention (Annex A, found below) as an expression of their assent to the Church’s understanding of marriage.

Also, at least one of the parties to be married must be active in Saint John’s or another Episcopal parish.  The norm for “active” member is regular attendance at the Sunday liturgy and financial support of the parish.

III. Can a divorced person be married?

Yes, provided he or she meets the following criteria:

1. A final decree of divorce or annulment must be provided to the priest for his or her permanent files.
2. The divorced person must demonstrate that he or she continues to be concerned about the well being of the former spouse and children, if any, of the prior marriage.
3. The priest must consult with and obtain the consent of the Bishop of West Missouri prior to the solemnization of the marriage.  A form for this purpose is provided by the Diocese of West Missouri and must be filled out in full by both persons to be married and by the priest who will officiate at the wedding.

IV. When can marriages be solemnized?

Marriages can be scheduled with the priest for anytime during the year except during the liturgical seasons of Advent (the four Sundays and weekdays prior to Christmas, December 25) and Lent (the 46 days prior to Easter).

The priest must be given at least 30 days notice before the marriage is to be solemnized.

V. What is required of the couple to be married?

The couple must be willing to attend at least four counseling sessions with the priest.  The purpose of these sessions is to help the couple prepare for the lifelong commitment of Christian marriage.  There is no charge for these sessions.

VII. Music.

The parish organist has “first right” privileges and should be contacted by the couple as soon as a wedding date has been set.  Since the marriage liturgy is a sacred rite of the Church, all music chosen must fit the criteria of “sacred” music.  The parish organist will work with the couple to be married to insure that the musical selections are appropriate to the occasion.

The organist’s fee for the wedding is $150.00.  If the organist is asked to attend the wedding rehearsal, there is an additional charge of $75.00 per hour.  Normally, a wedding rehearsal lasts no more than one hour.

VIII. Flowers.

Flowers must be arranged in coordination with Saint John’s Altar Guild. Excessive floral displays are not allowed.

IX. Photographs.

No flash pictures may be taken during the marriage liturgy, except during the entrance of the wedding party. A video camera that does not use artificial light may be set up in the back of the church. All other pictures are prohibited during the service. Reenactment photographs can be taken afterwards.

X. Other Expenses

The following fees are charged to cover extra costs to the parish associated with the wedding:

The check for the organist (made out to the person by name) and a check to the sexton, should be given to the priest at the wedding rehearsal, normally the evening before the actual marriage date.

If neither the couple is a member of Saint John’s parish, the honorarium for the priest (normally the Rector) is $175.00 for the liturgy.  This should be paid at the wedding rehearsal, along with the checks for the organist, sexton and for the church.

*This is charged only if neither of the couple is a member of the parish.